We’re out at Arlington Park today for our annual Opening Day broadcast. Opening Day at Arlington Park means two things to me: It’s a sure sign that summer is right around the corner and that I’m going to lose $300 to $400. If you were lucky enough to win some passes to the broadcast in the Secretariat Suite, we’ll see you there. If you didn’t win, hit an OTB, place your bets, and then listen to the races live on WCKG with Buzz and me.




Today we will have Plain White T’s in studio with us at 2:00 p.m., or thereabouts. As you can well imagine, that has already sent our own Pete Zimmerman into a tizzy, since he has to mix the band and he’s also responsible for "Music Snob Corner" on Thursdays. I said just make the Plain Whites the "Music Snob" band and Pete has resisted. I think that’s because they are too popular, what with appearing last night and tonight at Metro. We’ll see how that all turns out at 2:00 this afternoon. They will only do two songs instead of my requisite three, so they might be more like Pete than he thinks. I’m sure everything will work out fine, but tune in just to be sure.




I’m getting a rather late start on the day today (10:15). I might have had a few too many Red Bulls last night when I was at Atlantis. I wanted to make sure that I was awake and alert for the festivities, and I was both. In fact, I was awake and alert until about 4:00 a.m. The club is spectacular, the management was incredibly helpful and the girls are very hot. It’s the nicest gentleman’s club I’ve ever been to, and I’ve been to quite few. It was elegant, private, and very upscale. Plus, they had really great food that you get to eat with naked girls! Get out to Atlantis. You won’t be disappointed! This is going to sound stupid, but try the fried calamari..




I guess the fact that Greg Olsen, or "G-Reg" as I call him, made a filthy rap song when he was at Miami is a big deal. All rap songs are filthy, so that’s not a big deal in and of itself. Also, he’s a football player living in a dorm with a bunch of other football players. I expect them to get laid--a lot! That would be the main perk of being a college football player. I’m thinking getting laid, somebody else doing all of your homework, and staying out of jail is what college football is all about at Miami. That and, of course, and school spirit. Apparently for football players at “The U,” the spirit of choice is Grey Goose.




I spent the weekend in lovely Des Moines Iowa, and it was indeed quite lovely. The weather was sunny and 90 degrees; the people were friendly, and the pork plentiful. Unfortunately, I was inside for the bulk of my two days there, rehearsing with the Nadas/Dahlfins for our upcoming concert series this summer. We had a lot to go over in a relatively short amount of time, but I think it all came out sounding pretty good, and I’m excited about our “announcement’ this afternoon. Be listening for the details of our first show.




It is Friday morning and I don’t mean to be a complainer or anything, but my Internet has been out since Thursday evening. By Internet, I mean my high-speed Internet. I can access the web via modem, but why don’t I just write something down on parchment paper with a quill pen and send it via messenger on horseback? It’s amazing how much you take a high-speed connection for granted, until you don’t have it. Plus, it takes me 20 minutes just to remember how to hook the damned thing up to a modem.




Is it just me, or does John McCain’s wife look like a transvestite? He wants her out there on the campaign trail with him, so he must think she’s an asset. It looks like she’s had “some work” done and things got pulled a little too tight, or maybe it’s just from being out in the blazing Arizona sun too long. Would it kill McCain to have a hot female ASU cheerleader in tow at least as a campaign aide? I think McCain’s current wife is actually a trophy wife, but I’m not sure if he won or lost the contest.




Buzz and I both had a lot of fun broadcasting in the Bud Light Legends Lounge yesterday. We got to meet Luke Stuckmeyer from ComcastSportsNet, had a good chat with Neil Funk and Bill Wennington, and were date raped by Benny the Bull. Thanks to Jef “One F” Schmidt and all of the people at Anheuser Busch, Bulls management, and the folks at United Center for making things so effortless and fun. We plan on being back there for Round 2!!! We’ll have more tickets to give away too! At the rate the Bulls are going, there won’t be another Round 1 game here in Chicago. It was nice seeing Jimmy Gierczyk and Ted Malecki (My Chauffeur) in the 'CKG box too.




Buzz and I will be at United Center today in the Bud Light Legends Lounge. We will be providing you with the most in-depth NBA Playoff coverage that you will find anywhere. Buzz is known internationally as a basketball historian, and his re-creation of James Naismith’s invention of the game is utterly compelling. We will also have Neil Funk and Bill Wennington on with us, and who knows who else will stop by, so please tune in. We gave away five pairs of tickets to the game on Monday and those listeners will join us after the doors open at 5:00. That will give both Buzz and me plenty of time to get our makeup on and our dresses straight.




I am now officially a member of the Les Amis d’Escoffier Society of Chicago. I’m not sure that I should actually be in the Society, since I’m not in the chef or restaurant game, but I do have one very important qualification: I love to eat. They, I mean we, had our annual dinner at the new Renaissance Schaumberg Hotel and Convention Center. The place was amazing and the food was exceptional. You’ll have to tune in today for more of an update. I’ve got a lot of material, so tune in early.




I don’t understand several things about the recording featuring Alec Baldwin yelling at his daughter, Ireland:


1) Who names their kid Ireland?
2) Who hasn’t been that mad at their kids and called them worse names?
3) What kind of a mom lets that tape get out?